Need some marking over here for Task 2 Academic!

Post your Task 1 or 2 response and/or read the responses of other students and provide feedback.
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iruga234
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue May 26, 2015 10:35 am

Need some marking over here for Task 2 Academic!

Post by iruga234 »

Expected band score: 7
Am grateful if someone could kindly help me give me some guidance and point out my mistakes. Am extremely nervous for my exam on this coming Saturday.

Tests and examinations are a central feature of school systems in many countries.
Do you think the educational benefits of testing outweigh any disadvantages.
Give reasons for your answer.


Over the past few decades, tests and examinations are implemented in a lot of our education system. Many argued that the implementation of examinations actually brought about a lot of negative effects while some believed that tests are beneficial to students. In this essay, I am going to examine from both sides and propose my opinion.
On one side of the argument, it is believed that the implementation of exams in education system is internally beneficial to students. Firstly, exams have actually given directions for students in their studies. Most of them are motivated to study due to the pressure of scoring well in examinations. It is also possible to say that many believed that students actually grow more when they sit for exams as they are able to assess their own ability and knowledge in them. After knowing how incompetent they are, they would then strive for better grades, resulting in better brain development.
However, in my opinion, despite looking at the bright side of the examinations system, a lot of students have actually suffered from psychological issues due to it. Many experiences depression and unable to accept themselves as It has become socially common that good grades represent intelligence. Furthermore, failure in scoring well actually results in self rejection and in extreme cases, committing suicide.
In conclusion, although examinations are occasionally beneficial to students, the drawbacks of it should not be overlooked. Personally, it is apparent that the disadvantages outweigh the benefits. What could be worse than losing a human life?
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Dr.Matthew
Posts: 61
Joined: Thu Apr 16, 2015 12:11 am
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Re: Need some marking over here for Task 2 Academic!

Post by Dr.Matthew »

A tough call to say a 7 for this effort...maybe, but possibly NOT (sorry to say) as the number of technical errors below suggest; but...given a great topic, you have the ability to do well...one of the better youtube vids I have seen recently might be worth watching https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYpIzTI_TJg

Over the past few decades, tests and examinations are implemented in a lot of our education system[s]. Many [have] argued that the implementation of examinations actually brought about a lot of negative effects[,] while some believed that tests are beneficial to students. In this essay, I am going to examine from both sides and propose my opinion.
don't 'tease' the reader here...say WHAT your opnion/thesis is...?
On one side of the argument, it is believed that the implementation of exams in education system is internally
I wouldn't be sure what this term meant here?
beneficial to students. Firstly, exams have actually given directions for students in their studies. Most of them are motivated to study due to the pressure of scoring well in examinations. It is also possible to say that many believed that students actually grow more when they sit for exams as they are able to assess their own ability and knowledge in them. After knowing how incompetent they are, they would then strive for better grades, resulting in better brain development.
However, in my opinion, despite looking at the bright side of the examinations system, a lot of students have actually suffered from psychological issues due to it. Many experiences depression and [are] unable to accept themselves as It has become socially common that good grades represent intelligence. Furthermore, failure in scoring well actually results in self rejection and in extreme cases, committing suicide.
In conclusion, although examinations are occasionally beneficial to students, the drawbacks of it should not be overlooked. Personally, it is apparent that the disadvantages outweigh the benefits. What could be worse than losing a human life?
a slightly over the top finish...what do others think...hmmnn, I wouldn't slip into a strongly rhetorical voice right at the end...
Fonedane
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Jun 02, 2015 4:35 am

Re: Need some marking over here for Task 2 Academic!

Post by Fonedane »

Permission to use And Learning.
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