Pls help me check and give me a grade my reading

[joeinsunshine]

Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish
Why do you think this is happening?
What can government do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced

How to process more and more rubbish nowadays become a problem which have to be solved urgently. Before we come up with solution, we have first figure out why there is increasingly amount of rubbish being made.

In my opinion, people getting wealther than the past is the majority reason for this problem. First of all, it change the way businesses pack their products. As people have more money than before, they start looking for better quality of product including the outlook of then. Therefore, manufactures must place more resources on the package design, making it look more luxury in order to draw customers' attention.

Besides, waste is also another main reason that contribute to the increasing amounts of rubbish. In a wealth society, people tend to generate more wastes because they can simply buy another one. Unfortunately, people seems like always forget the idea of treasure once they have money.

To deal with the rubbish problem, government can be a significant role on this. There are few options that government can do. First of all-tax. For instance, tax of plastic bag, consumption tax and the so- called rubbish tax. By increasing the coat of generating rubbish, people will consider more before they made unnecessary rubbish. Secondly, government can simply tackle with the problem by education. Teaching people not to waste and avoid making rubbish is the most fundamental way to combat the problem.

In conclusion, most of those increased rubbish are unnecessary. Hence, as long as we can reduce wastes, rubbish problem is not really as serious as that.

[yhjsaber]

A problem of modern society is the ever increasing used plastic bags and different kinds of rubbish in our environment. Even worse is that most of these wastes are difficult to be disposed of, which causes considerable damage to our environment. In my opinion, the causes for this problem are threefold, and to which effective solutions must be found.
The first and foremost reason is that people today consume much more on a daily basis than they did in the past, which means the amount of wastes derived from the product we buy and the food we eat are becoming increasingly high. Secondly, customers nowadays tend to favor whatever products that are packed in nicely decorated plastic containers or bags. With the view to attracting more customers without increasing the cost, manufacturers and retailers tend to choose cheap but easy-to-be-formed-into-shape plastic materials to wrap up their products. These two factors identified above have led to the over-enthusiastic use of plastic packaging, and because most of these plastic bags or containers are difficult to decompose, there has been increasingly high amount of plastic garbage being produced every day, resulting in severe environmental problems such as water pollution and decrease in the vegetation coverage.
Another important cause of this problem is our tendency to use something once and throw it away. This is particularly evident in big cities where people tend to use one-off commodities because they think it is convenient and hygienic. We forgot even these disposable goods have consumed precious energy and natural resources, and more severely, they can be extremely damaging to our environment.
To tackle this problem, the awareness of the importance of environmental protection and energy conservation must be raised among people in public. This can be done by educating the younger generation in this respect and forcing adults to act. In addition, high tax could be applied to limit the use of non-biodegradable packaging. Moreover, subsidies can be offered to manufacturers who choose to clean up their manufacturing process and replace their packaging with more environmentally friendly ones.
In conclusion, if the measures provided above were firmly and effectively implemented, the amount of waste we produce could be substantially reduced. Moreover, the successful tackling of this problem can be a very good starting point for solving other related environmental issues.

[joeinsunshine]

Thx model answer, what
band do u think I can score?

[yhjsaber]

you made few grammatical mistakes in your essay like people "seems" and the first idea about why people generate more rubbish every is not clearly and sufficiently developed. I would say 6.5. If you correct thoses grammatical mistakes and make your structure more logical. 7.5 is possible or probably 8

[joeinsunshine]

Thx a lot I will working on it