Pls grade my Task 2 writing: Traffic Jams

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larry_li
Posts: 16
Joined: Wed Jul 15, 2015 2:44 am

Pls grade my Task 2 writing: Traffic Jams

Post by larry_li »

I greatly appreciate if you can evaluate my essay. Thank you very much~ :)

The most effective way to reduce traffic jams in big cities is to ban the use of private cars and promote public transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Traffic jams are one of the many chronic headaches shared by many cities throughout the world. The economic and environmental consequences result from traffic congestion are taking a heavy toll on the society and should be addressed right away. One of the many suggestions put forwards is to enact legislation to outlaw private cars in urban areas and to advocate the use of public transport. This suggestion is fully supported with the reasons elaborated below.

First of all, it is an undeniable fact that private cars can carry very few passengers than most other transport means. For example, two sport unity vehicles can normally carry 16 passengers whereas a double-decker bus can carry more than 50 people while both taking up the same amount of space. It is obvious that private cars are so much less efficient than public transport. Thus, it is very sensible to enact regulations to prohibit the use of private vehicles in big cities in an attempt to reduce traffic congestion.

In addition, passing laws and granting public funding to promote the public awareness of the benefits of mass transport systems and to expand the network of the systems are certainly very helpful to curtail traffic jams. It is because the reason for most people choosing private cars over public transport is largely due to the fact that the existing public transport systems are not extensive enough to take people to the places they need to be. And by expanding the transport systems and campaigning for the use of them, people will naturally and gradually switch to using public transport instead. The severity of traffic jams will then be mitigated.

After considering how passing laws to ban private cars in the cities and to extend and promote public transport systems can help reduce traffic jams, it is clear that such measures should be adopted. It is also hoped that the political leaders around the world will take on initiatives to promulgate such laws.
Paul Davey
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Re: Pls grade my Task 2 writing: Traffic Jams

Post by Paul Davey »

Here's the introduction. It's a very good one :geek:

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larry_li
Posts: 16
Joined: Wed Jul 15, 2015 2:44 am

Re: Pls grade my Task 2 writing: Traffic Jams

Post by larry_li »

thank you for your correction and suggestion :D
Paul Davey wrote:Here's the introduction. It's a very good one :geek:

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