letter < travel insurance>

[durai]

On a recent holiday you lost a valuable item. Fortunately, you have travel insurance to cover the cost of anything.
Write a letter to the manager of your insurance company. In your letter
Describe the item you lost
Explain how you lost it
Tell the insurance company what you would like them to do.

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Dear Sir or Madam,

My name is Poongodi, and I am writing to claim the money for the item I missed on my travel to Australia from Singapore.

In reality, what happened was I took my 10 inch Sony Tab on my visit to Singapore. Unluckily, I lost this expensive gismo that I bought for 1400$ at JB Hi-Fi shop in Melbourne.

As you see, I was using this tablet to play games on the flight. While landing I put this device in my cabin bag, but when I pass the Immigration I was very surprised to find this one missing. I believed someone may unknowingly have taken this electronic gadget by assuming theirs.

As you understand, my travel insurance covers for anything that I lost along my travel. So please let me know the procedures for applying to claim the money for this lost item, such as filling out a claim form. For your perusal, my insurance number is 1224D.

Please write to me as quickly as possible.

Yours faithfully,

Durai

[allen_zhang]

Hi Durai,
This kind of letter is exactly what I will panic at. Anyway, I'll just try to see what I can do.

Dear Sir or Madam,

My name is Poongodi, and I am writing to claim the money for the item I missed on my travel to Australia from Singapore.

claim the money -- It's understandable, but I am not sure if it is "formal". Below is what I learned from a sample letter.
I am writing to file a claim on the travel insurance I have with you, as I lost an expensive item on my trip to Australia from Singapore .

In reality, what happened was I took my 10 inch Sony Tab on my visit to Singapore. Unluckily, I lost this expensive gismo that I bought for 1400$ at JB Hi-Fi shop in Melbourne.

How about below?
The lost item was a 10 inch Sony Tab I bought at for 1400$ at JB Hi-Fi shop in Melbourne.


As you see, I was using this tablet to play games on the flight. While landing I put this device in my cabin bag, but when I passed the Immigration I was very surprised to find this one missing. I believed (present tense will work) someone may unknowingly have taken this electronic gadget by assuming theirs.

How about below?
The accident happened on May 10. I took the flight AU380 flying to Australia from Singapore and I used my tablet to play games on the flight and put it in my cabin bag before landing. Unfortunately, when I passed the immigration at the airport, I found that I have lost my tablet. I contacted the airline company immediately but they did not find it. I assume that someone must have mistakenly taken it.


As you understand,(According to the insurance contract,) my travel insurance covers for anything that I lost along my travel. So please let me know the procedures for applying to claim the money for this lost item, such as filling out a claim form. For your perusal, my insurance number is 1224D.

From my point of view: "in reality", "As you see" and "As you understand" sound "informal".

How about below?
According to the insurance terms, any lost item costs more than $200 is covered by the contract. So I am entitled to request either a replacement or compensation for my tablet. Please let me know what kind of paperwork I will need to do to make this claim.


Please write to me as quickly as possible.

How about below?
I would like to thank you in advance for your prompt assistance regarding this matter.



Yours faithfully,

Durai

My version(I am not saying my version is better, I just want to borrow your idea and then write and memorize it):

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to file a claim on the travel insurance I have with you, as I lost an expensive item on my trip to Australia from Singapore

The lost item was a 10 inch Sony Tab I bought for 1400$ at JB Hi-Fi shop in Melbourne.

The accident happened on May 10 when I was taking the flight AU380 to Australia from Singapore. I used my tablet to play games on the flight and put it in my cabin bag before landing. Unfortunately, when I passed the immigration at the airport, I found my tablet missing. I contacted the airline company immediately but they did not find it. I assume that someone must have mistakenly taken it.

According to the insurance terms, any lost item costs more than $200 is covered by the contract. So I am entitled to request either a replacement or compensation for my tablet. Please let me know what kind of paperwork I will need to do to make an official claim.

I would like to thank you in advance for your prompt assistance regarding this matter.

Yours faithfully,

Allen

[durai]

Hi Allen,

' As you understand', As you know, " are good phrases used in many letters, but I am not sure whether these are formal.

With your wordings, you may score 7+.

I tried to write this one in 15 minutes, I hope my letter is at least 6.5 worth. ( That's what I needed)


I will post my essay soon,


Durai

[allen_zhang]

Hi Durai,
I definitely cannot write a letter like the one I posted. On this piece, I did a lot of research to have it done.

Just a few tips I learned from others:
The tone of a letter is very important. This means we need to use "formal" words for "formal" letter.
Also, I feel that showing a bit courtesy in a letter is better. that's why I used :"I would like to thank you...".
I saw you used "gismo", "gadget " as alternatives for "tablet". I am not sure how an examiner will be impressed by them. From my point of view, this approach won't make the letter clearer.

Waiting for your essay.

Best regards,
Allen