Please, review this essay task 2

Post your Task 1 or 2 response and/or read the responses of other students and provide feedback.
Post Reply
wilsonbmn
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed May 28, 2014 2:09 am

Please, review this essay task 2

Post by wilsonbmn »

Hi,

Could you review or estimate my band score ? I'm studying by myself, which makes the things a little more complicated since I can't have a feedback! Thx!

---------------------------
Museums are a plentiful source of information and they are visited by thousands of different people every day. By paying a simple visit to a museum, people can enhance their knowledge and culture. Whether the purpose of museums must be solely education or they should be considered as entertainment is a matter of warm debate. Both sides of this argument will be analyzed and discussed below.
Firstly, it is undeniable the educational responsibility of museums, provided that they are keepers of impressive things and knowledge about an enormous range of subjects. For instance, no matter how much we read about dinosaurs, the capacity of learning will never be as effective and intense as when we visit a natural history centre. In tandem with this, no book could ever explain the Renaissance better than a painting. Indeed, it is easy to understand why some experts believe museums are educational.
However, on the other side of this argument, many people defend museum’s role as an entertainment centre. They consider that independent on what information it is going to be presented, it will be valueless whether those who are seeing it are not enjoying that moment. School tours play a good example here. When primary school students visit museums, there is always a lot of excitement and they leave the place full of knowledge, and they will certainly come another time.
To summarize, experts both agree and disagree on what should museum’s primary objective. As seen above, education and entertainment purposes are ultimately accomplished by centres and it is almost impossible to define one of these areas as the most important. It is predicted that museums will keep entertaining people at same time they effortlessly deliver educational information.
Johnson zhang
Posts: 153
Joined: Fri May 23, 2014 8:34 am

Re: Please, review this essay task 2

Post by Johnson zhang »

Museums are a plentiful source of information what do you mean and they are visited by thousands of different people every day. By paying a simple visit to a museum, people can enhance their knowledgeof what? and culture. Whether the purpose of museums must be solely education or they should be considered as entertainment is a matter of warm debate. Both sides of this argument will be analyzed and discussed below.

Firstly, it is undeniable the educational responsibility of museums, and then?provided that they are keepers of impressive things and knowledge about an enormous range of subjects. For instance, no matter how much we read about dinosaurs, the capacity of learning will never be as effective and intense as when we visit a natural history centre. In tandem with this, no book could ever explain the Renaissance better than a painting. Indeed, it is easy to understand why some experts believe museums are educational.

However, on the other side of this argument, many people defend museum’s role as an entertainment centre. They consider that independent on what information it is going to be presented, it will be valueless whether those who are seeing it are not enjoying that moment. School tours play a good example here. When primary school students visit museums, there is always a lot of excitement and they leave the place full of knowledge, and they will certainly come another time.
both of paragraphs are supportive. where is your opposing para?

To summarize, experts both agree and disagree on what should museum’s primary objective is what?. As seen above, education and entertainment purposes are ultimately accomplished by centres and it is almost impossible to define one of these areas as the most important. It is predicted that museums will keep entertaining people at same time they effortlessly deliver educational information.


where is the question? how could we know if you are actually answering the question?
anyway, i would give a 6
Nothing is impossible! Band score 9 is certainly not.
wilsonbmn
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed May 28, 2014 2:09 am

Re: Please, review this essay task 2

Post by wilsonbmn »

Thank you. Sorry about not entering the question...
On the task, I was asked to debate if museums where supposed to be a centre for entertainment or education.
Post Reply