Task 2 (GT) Please mark my Essay.

[AreebZ]

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
It has been proved that smoking kills. In some countries it has been made illegal for people to smoke in all public places except in certain areas. All countries should make these rules.

Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

You should write at least 250 words.

Smoking gives guarantee of death of the smoker. The negative ramifications of using the tobacco are very serious; therefore, some nations have prohibited use of the Cigarette in public venues. This step taken by states to curb the utilization of the tobacco is supported for making healthy environment. This support will be proven by analyzing air pollution and spreading of Cancer from smoke in this essay.

Firstly, smoking is polluting the environment because the exhaust of carbon fumes from smoke is contaminating the air. For example, in America, people smoking at public spots are generating 30 % of toxic gases in the atmosphere. This example shows that an emission of the smoking is instilling the entire world to the pollutant particles in air. Thus, the step to ban the habit of smoking in public is supported for the safety of the human beings.

In addition, people who are consuming items of tobacco, like Cigar and Cigarette, they are exposing themselves and others to the Cancer disease. For instance, a research conducted by Royal Institute of London, presents a report on the death causes. This report apparently mentioned that 55 % of early aged deaths are caused due to practice of smoking at open community places. Therefore, it is now clear that imposing the punishable law on smoking the Cigarette is positive step taken by state executives.

After analyzing polluted air and Cancer caused by smoking, it is obvious why the idea of limiting the smoke has garnered the support. It is recommended that all countries should take stringent steps to limit tobacco usage in foreseeable future to save the new generation.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

First sentence - Wrong! Only about a third to a half of smokers die from smoking related illnesses.

First main paragraph - Every time you breathe out, you breathe out carbon - so hold your breath! The suggestion that smokers create 30% of the toxic gases is a joke. That would put them on a similar level to cars - or even higher!

If I smoke (which I don't), isn't that my choice? Over half of smoking related deaths are from smoking "at open community places"???? (So, not at home, for instance!?)

There is no personal opinion in the conclusion.

There does appear to be some good vocabulary in the essay, but it is not used to create an effective argument. There are some complex grammatical structures but the number of mistakes is quite high.

Overall, work on arguments and grammar.

All the best,
David

[Flick]

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
It has been proved that smoking kills. In some countries it has been made illegal for people to smoke in all public places except in certain areas. All countries should make these rules.

Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

You should write at least 250 words.

Smoking is guaranteed to be the cause of death of the smoker. The negative ramifications of using tobacco are very serious; therefore, some nations have prohibited smoking in public venues. This step taken by states to curb the utilization of tobacco is supported for creating a healthy environment. This viewpoint will be proven by analyzing air pollution and the spreading of cancer from smoke in this essay.

Firstly, smoking is polluting the environment because the exhaust of carbon fumes from smoke is contaminating the air. For example, in America, people smoking at public spots are generating 30 % of toxic gases in the atmosphere. This example shows that smoking is polluting the entire world. Thus, the step to ban the habit of smoking in public is supported for the safety of all human beings.

In addition, people who consume items of tobacco, like cigars and cigarettes, are exposing themselves and others to cancer. For instance, research conducted by the Royal Institute of London mentioned that 55% of early deaths are caused by smoking in open public places. Therefore, it is now clear that imposing a law on smoking cigarettes is a positive step taken by the government.

After analyzing the pollution and cancer caused by smoking, it is obvious why the idea of limiting smoking has garnered support. It is recommended that all countries should take stringent steps to limit tobacco usage in the foreseeable future to save future generations.