Rate my task 1

Post your Task 1 or 2 response and/or read the responses of other students and provide feedback.
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npr.ielts7
Posts: 27
Joined: Thu Oct 10, 2013 6:15 am

Rate my task 1

Post by npr.ielts7 »

You have read an article in a newspaper that contains incorrect information about your town/city. Write a letter to the editor of the newspaper to inform them about the mistake. In your letter
- Describe your knowledge of the city.
- Explain what information was incorrect in your opinion.
- Suggest how the editor could fix this error.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am a subscriber of your newspaper and I really enjoy reading the news items in it, especially articles in the editorial column. I must appreciate the efforts you put into research on the topic. However, there were some factual errors in your last article on the heritage of Alwal town.

I am a resident living in this town for last 60 years. I have worked as an architect in the town planning department and designed major projects.

In the article about the heritage of Alwal, it was wrongly mentioned that the state government funded the construction of Market Yard. However, in reality, locals have voluntarily donated their one week salary towards the construction cost. Such an act was not seen before in the country and all leading newspapers have covered this news on their front page.

I request you to apologise to readers for this mistake and re-publish the same article with corrected information in your next publication.

Yours faithfully,
Praneeth
IELTS Scores:- BC: (06/07/2013): R-8;L-9;W-6.5;S-6| IDP: (21/09/2013) R-9;L-8.5;W-6.5;S-6.5 | (09/11/2013) ????
delvydavis
Posts: 57
Joined: Sun Aug 18, 2013 1:44 pm
Location: Santo Domingo
Contact:

Re: Rate my task 1

Post by delvydavis »

npr.ielts7 wrote:You have read an article in a newspaper that contains incorrect information about your town/city. Write a letter to the editor of the newspaper to inform them about the mistake. In your letter
- Describe your knowledge of the city.
- Explain what information was incorrect in your opinion.
- Suggest how the editor could fix this error.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am a subscriber of your newspaper and I really enjoy reading the news items in it, especially articles in the editorial column. I must appreciate the efforts you put into research on the topic. However, there were some factual errors in your last article ( put a date) on (about) the heritage of Alwal town.

I am a resident living in this town for last 60 years. I have worked as an architect in the town planning department and designed major projects. (name a project : such as Taj Mahal project ;) or Airport Project )

In the article about the heritage of Alwal, it was wrongly mentioned that the state government funded the construction of Market Yard. However, in reality, locals have voluntarily donated their one week salary towards the construction cost. Such an act was not seen before in the country and all leading newspapers have covered this news on their front page.

I request you to apologise to readers for this mistake and re-publish the same article with corrected information in your next publication.

Yours faithfully,
Praneeth
This letter is good. Nothing much mistakes to point out.
Perhaps, the last sentence could modify to look attractive. "I request you to apologize" doesn't look good or doesn't fit to the letter
Instead of "Faithfully", I think "sincerely" suits more.

BR
Delvy
PAST IELTS:
(09-06-2012) L-7,R-6.6,W-5.5,S-8.5 ; Overall-7.0
(06-07-2013) L-6.5,R-7,W-5.5,S-6.5 ; Overall-6.5
(21-09-2013) L-6.5,R-6.5,W-7.5,S-7; Overall-7.0
(07-12-2013) L-8.0,R-7.0,W-7.5,S-8.5 Overall-8.0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFn4S3z_WO4
npr.ielts7
Posts: 27
Joined: Thu Oct 10, 2013 6:15 am

Re: Rate my task 1

Post by npr.ielts7 »

rephrased letter as per the suggestion.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am a subscriber of your newspaper and I really enjoy reading the news items in it, especially articles in the editorial column. I must appreciate the efforts you put into research on the topic. However, there were some factual errors in your last article on 21st October 2013 aboutthe heritage of Alwal town.

I am a resident living in this town for last 60 years. I have worked as an architect in the town planning department and designed major projects.

In the article about the heritage of Alwal, it was wrongly mentioned that the state government funded the construction of Market Yard. However, in reality, locals have voluntarily donated their one week salary towards the construction cost. Such an act was not seen before in the country and all leading newspapers have covered this news on their front page.

I hope you will rectify this error and re-publish the same article with corrected information in your next publication.

Yours faithfully,
Praneeth
IELTS Scores:- BC: (06/07/2013): R-8;L-9;W-6.5;S-6| IDP: (21/09/2013) R-9;L-8.5;W-6.5;S-6.5 | (09/11/2013) ????
npr.ielts7
Posts: 27
Joined: Thu Oct 10, 2013 6:15 am

Re: Rate my task 1

Post by npr.ielts7 »

Hello Delvy,
ielts-simon.com says that formal letter with no name should end with Yours faithfully.
delvydavis wrote: Instead of "Faithfully", I think "sincerely" suits more.

BR
Delvy
IELTS Scores:- BC: (06/07/2013): R-8;L-9;W-6.5;S-6| IDP: (21/09/2013) R-9;L-8.5;W-6.5;S-6.5 | (09/11/2013) ????
delvydavis
Posts: 57
Joined: Sun Aug 18, 2013 1:44 pm
Location: Santo Domingo
Contact:

Re: Rate my task 1

Post by delvydavis »

yes, I understand; but this letter is kind/type of semi-formal. Therefore, you could use "sincerely"

Since this is a semiformal letter, in the salutation you could use, Dear editor / Dear Mr. xyz

Aa far as I know, a letter to the known person such as librarian, doctor, editor, your manager/supervisor is treated as semi-formal where you could use the salutation as Dear Mr/Ms/Mrs. XYZ and ending has to be "yours sincerely"

BR.
Delvy
PAST IELTS:
(09-06-2012) L-7,R-6.6,W-5.5,S-8.5 ; Overall-7.0
(06-07-2013) L-6.5,R-7,W-5.5,S-6.5 ; Overall-6.5
(21-09-2013) L-6.5,R-6.5,W-7.5,S-7; Overall-7.0
(07-12-2013) L-8.0,R-7.0,W-7.5,S-8.5 Overall-8.0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFn4S3z_WO4
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