Number of companies that are selling their products worldwid

Post your Task 1 or 2 response and/or read the responses of other students and provide feedback.
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tusharielts
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon May 12, 2014 2:36 pm

Number of companies that are selling their products worldwid

Post by tusharielts »

Industrialization and Technological advancements have increased production capacity of companies multifold. Companies therefore are searching for new markets worldwide to sell their products. Many people have welcomed this move by the companies but there are others who are against it.
Many commentators are of the view that if the companies are allowed to sell their products worldwide they would pose a threat to the local markets. They argue that it would be very difficult for the local vendors to cope with the standards and prices offered by these foreign companies. This may eventually result in closing down of such shops and increase in unemployment. The other argument put forward is that companies will be more focused on foreign markets those earn them more profits while the consumers at home may suffer.
However, there is a different perspective to it which depicts various advantages of opening market to companies worldwide. Firstly, consumers get lot more choices to choose from. With variety of products made available by different companies consumer will have advantage to choose the product that suits best to his/her needs. Secondly, product’s standard will rise and prices will fall. Companies will compete against each other to provide best quality product at cheaper price to the consumers. Lastly, as the foreign companies enter the market, country’s economy strengthens. Foreign companies bring along with them foreign currency which contributes to the GDP of the country.
Finally, if we look at both side of argument we understand that it is a very complex issue with no clear answers.
tusharielts
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon May 12, 2014 2:36 pm

Re: Number of companies that are selling their products worl

Post by tusharielts »

Task 2 : Number of companies that are selling their products worldwide is increasing nowadays.
Does this phenomenon have more advantages or disadvantages? Write your view and share your experience.

Kindly review my writing. I am a GT candidate
tusharielts
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon May 12, 2014 2:36 pm

Re: Number of companies that are selling their products worl

Post by tusharielts »

HI Ryan,
Can u please find some time to grade this essay. I have my ielts on coming sat.
durai
Posts: 401
Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2014 6:35 pm

Re: Number of companies that are selling their products worl

Post by durai »

Industrialization and technological advancements have increased production capacity of companies twofold. Companies are, therefore, searching for new markets worldwide to sell their products. Many people are welcoming this move what move? big assumption , reduces task response score by the companies but there are others who are against it. lacks sentence coherence, I can't relate one sentence to other)
You are not clear what your essay going to discuss, in this case, it should be benefits and drawbacks of such worldwide business

Many commentators are of the view that if the companies are allowed to sell their products worldwide they would pose a threat to the local markets. good point They argue that it would be very difficult for the local vendors to cope with the standards and prices offered by these foreign companies. This may eventually results in closing down of such shops and increase in unemployment hiw you say it leads to jobless, without closer look of examples you cannot put that in. The other argument put forward is that companies will be more focused on foreign markets those earn them more profits while the consumers at home may suffer. last sentence is not essential becasue you have said on epoint already, better keep one point one para, then expand your argument with examples

However, there is a different perspective to it which depicts various advantages of opening market to companies worldwide. Firstly, consumers would have lot of choices to choose from. With variety of products made available by different companies, consumer would benefit by choosing the product that suits best to their needs. Secondly, product’s standard what standard? will rise and prices will fall. Companies will compete against each other to provide best quality product at cheaper price to the consumers. Lastly, as the foreign companies enter the market, country’s economy strengthens. Foreign companies bring along with them foreign currency which contributes to the GDP of the country. you have done listing paragraph, it is fine to do, as long as you give some good examples, otherwise it redues your task achievement score, which states, " attempt to answer the question is visible but could be more fully extended"


Finally, if we look at both side of argument we understand that it is a very complex issue with no clear answers.

very short script to end the essay, I know you have said there are no clear answers, means you answered the question, but you can extend this conclusion with another couple of sentences.


hi, you have used word " companies" 11 times, they mark you down on LR if you repeat these common words, instead you could have used " industries-organisations-product makers- manufacturers- productions-international trading units- )


the above essay would demonstrates band 5.5 to 6. ( I am not an assessor)
JAN 2014 L 8.5 R 8 W 6.5 S 6.5
FEB 2014 L 8 R 8 W 7 S 6.5
APR 2014 L 8 R 9 W 6.5 S 7
JUN 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6
July 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6.5
OCT 2014 L 7.5 R 7 W 7 S 7
tusharielts
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon May 12, 2014 2:36 pm

Re: Number of companies that are selling their products worl

Post by tusharielts »

Hi Durai,
Thanks for providing useful insights.
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