Please check my writing i need 7+

[Qasim]

Nowadays people live in the society where consumer goods are cheaper to buy. Do you think its advantages outweigh disadvantages?

In this contemporary epoch, people are living in a society where daily usable items are less expensive. I agree with this statement that prices of goods have certainly reduced to some level from past because of rapid growth in technology. In my opinion, less expensive products have many advantages and less disadvantages.

Previously it was not possible for the low income families to purchase certain products like smart phones and cars, because only rich people can afford purchasing such products. In today’s society products have become cheaper because of immense evolution in technology and approximately there are billion users at the moment using internet and smart phones. Furthermore, people from every community can interact with each other using social media sites like Facebook and Twitter. Therefore the gap between rich and poor is also decreasing. Secondly, evolution in technology has also impacted other industries such as food and cloth. People can now purchase branded things which were previously not possible.

Apart from advantages it has some disadvantages. People have now become addicted to use such products and their physical health and social circle is suffering. Moreover people are so massively occupied and they are unable to give time to their families. Young generation is unable to focus on their studies. However, I believe parents and teachers should educate the students about limited used of technology and importance of interaction with people around them.

In conclusion, I believe that there are several benefits of having cheaper consumer good products. As discussed above, parents and mentors should educate teenagers about benefits and remedies of using such gadgets.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello Qasim!

Overall, quite good, but I think that you have looked at the topic in a very limited way. In the second main paragraph, you present some good ideas, but they are really 'listed' rather than developed.

I would encourage students to look at the vocabulary used in this essay. There are some very good terms used correctly - rapid growth, low income families, interact, gap, impacted, branded, social circle, mentors, importance of interaction.

All the best,
David

[Flick]

Nowadays people live in the society where consumer goods are cheaper to buy. Do you think its advantages outweigh disadvantages?

In this contemporary epoch, people are living in a society where daily usable items are less expensive. I agree with the statement that the prices of goods have certainly reduced significantly compared to the past because of rapid growth in technology. In my opinion, less expensive products have many advantages and fewer disadvantages.

Previously, it was not possible for low income families to purchase certain products like smart phones and cars, because only rich people could afford such products. In today’s society, products have become cheaper because of the rapid evolution in technology. There are approximately one billion internet and smart phone users at the moment. Furthermore, people from every community can interact with each other using social media sites like Facebook and Twitter. Therefore, the gap between rich and poor is also decreasing. Secondly, evolution in technology has also impacted other industries such as food and clothes. People can now purchase branded items which were previously too expensive.

Apart from the advantages, there are some disadvantages. People have now become addicted to using such products, and their physical health and social circle is suffering as a result. Moreover, people are so massively occupied they are unable to give time to their families. The young generation is unable to focus on their studies. However, I believe parents and teachers should educate students about limited use of technology and the importance of interaction with the people around them.

In conclusion, I believe that there are several benefits of having cheaper consumer goods. As discussed above, parents and mentors should educate teenagers about the benefits and consequences of using such gadgets.