ielts writing task 2

[danmaikobo]

Dear friends,
Please kindly evaluate my essay!

Question:
In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is a good for country, while others belive that government should control the salaries and limit the amount people can earn.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Attempt:

Certain number of individuals ultimately earn huge income in some countries. Many people are of the view that this is beneficial for a nation, whereas others think that authorities should restric what people earns through contractionary policies. This essay will discuss how high wages and salaries lead to growth of nations' economies as well as low national income from small income earnings.

First of all, nations whose employee's working conditions and salaries are handsome tends to enjoy positive multiplier effect. When individuals earn higher money their purchasing power expands which is translated to increase in comsuption, rise in comsuption brings about attractiveness in investment thereby resulting to prosperous growth in the economy.

However, lower wages and salaries indicate poor performance of the economy. Countries whose workers are not previlegde to enjoy walfare and large sources of earnings virtually affect the working of the economy. For instance, low income impact on comsuption and investment negatively and that has a multiplier effect on a nation's output given the fact that poor conditions is an indication of country's economic recession.

In short, bigger salaries result to prosperous national income through effective demand.while contracted sources of money lead to the deterioration of country's output through ineffective demand and poor purchasing power. I'm my opinion, countries who are concern about their workforce have financial autonomy and stronger economies than other nations with less income.

[Flick]

Dear friends,
Please kindly evaluate my essay!

Question:
In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is a good for country, while others belive that government should control the salaries and limit the amount people can earn.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Attempt:

Some individuals earn a huge income in some countries. Many people are of the view that this is beneficial for a nation, whereas others think that authorities should restrict what people earn through contractionary policies. This essay will discuss how high wages and salaries lead to growth of nations' economies as well as low national income from small income earnings.

First of all, nations whose employees' working conditions and salaries are handsome tend to enjoy a positive multiplier effect. When individuals earn more money, their purchasing power expands which is translated into an increase in consumption. Arise in consumption brings about more investment, thereby resulting in prosperous growth in the economy.

However, lower wages and salaries indicate poor performance of the economy. Countries whose workers are not previleged to enjoy welfare and large sources of earnings virtually affect the working of the economy. For instance, low income impacts negatively on consumption and investment, and that has a multiplier effect on a nation's output given the fact that poor conditions is an indication of a country's economic recession.

In short, bigger salaries result in prosperous national income through effective demand, while contracted sources of money lead to the deterioration of a country's output through ineffective demand and poor purchasing power. In my opinion, countries who are concerned about their workforce have financial autonomy and stronger economies than other nations with less income.