Please evaluate my essay !!

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Abdelkader1988
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Jun 17, 2017 10:43 pm

Please evaluate my essay !!

Post by Abdelkader1988 »

Question
What does the saying “there are two sides to every coin” mean to you? Explain the saying and give some specific examples to illustrate the meaning.
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My Answer:

Everyday life teaches us many lessons, these lessons are often translated into proverbs and sayings that convey the message with a few words. One of the best sayings life has ever taught me is “there are always two sides to every coin”. However, this saying has a different meaning for everyone of us and it depends on one’s personal background to explain its meaning and how he perceives it. In this essay I am going to shed some light on what this saying means to me.
In the past, being a child and have no responsibilities or duties I dreamt of adolescence when I could do whatever I wanted far from my parents’ control. I was dreaming of the day when I would become independent and free, free to go out, free to travel. But as soon as finished my studies and graduated, I realised the burden of the independence and what supposed to be freedom.
One day after another it has become clear that “there are two sides to every coin’. Every stage in my life has its bitterness and sweetness, every change has its advantages and disadvantages. Nothing is perfect and you have to accept the trade off if you wish to live a happy life. Even though I did not used to be optimistic, I managed to shift my thinking towards the future because the past will not return and there is no benefits to regret the old days.
From a philosophical point of view, life is a continuous movement. This movement is a result of the embedded contradiction in every aspect of our lives. It is still a dilemma to determine whether this contradiction exists in our perception or it is the nature of the things, whether the goodness and the badness are adjectives that we invented or they are good and bad in themselves.
Finally, realising that every matter in our lives has its good side and bad side is an essential condition for critical thinking. Such type of thinking that can save us from the narrow-minded extremism that we suffer these days.

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Thanks in advance
David.IELTS.Examiner
IELTS Examiner
IELTS Examiner
Posts: 1371
Joined: Tue May 05, 2015 4:34 am

Re: Please evaluate my essay !!

Post by David.IELTS.Examiner »

Hello!

This is a BRILLIANT question!!! This phrase is SO BADLY used by many IELTS candidates! Let's see how you do ...

The introduction is a little long (compared with the main paragraphs).

Overall, your points are reasonable, but I think that you need to be a little more specific. The second main paragraph is better than the others, IMO.

The range of the grammar is very good and accuracy is good.

Vocabulary is reasonable, but I think that you need to be more specific and be careful with words/phrases like 'whatever I wanted'.

So, quite good overall, and could easily be improved to good or very good.

All the best,
David
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