assessment required for task2 essay - academic

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hayaalqasem
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assessment required for task2 essay - academic

Post by hayaalqasem »

Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude male or females from certain professions because of their gender?
It is thought that females and males have distinct abilities. They are different particularly in physical and mental nature. As a consequence, some people claim that it is proper to compel men and women to work in specific areas of jobs with respect to their gender. I completely disagree with this claim for two reasons. This essay will explain the two causes and support with examples.

First, people would appear to be more productive if they choose their career life freely. In other words, when females or males opt for their future jobs according to their requirements, this will have a positive impact ob the productivity of the work. For example, a male teacher who prefers to educate primary school students will feel more satisfied than the one who enforced to apply for specific jobs according to his gender such as construction worker. As a result, an employee who chose the job freely will achieve a personal fulfillment and offer more efficient service to a society whereas the other will do their tasks unenthusiastic-ally. For this reason, I feel that individuals should not be obligated to have particular professions.

Second, it is believed that with the technological advances both sexes have become capable to perform all forms of occupations. It means that despite of the great discrepancies in the abilities between men and women, the electronic equipment and machines have eliminated these differences. For instance, it is likely to find women who work as firefighter or as police officer, because of latest-release tools that can be used to defend themselves and to do their duties efficiently. Moreover, there are many men work as househusband since the availability of various types of machines including dishwasher, washing machines, and microwaves . Thus , these digital appliances facilitate the lives of both men and women as well as enable them to occupy any type of job even the one which is inconsistent with their potential.

By way of conclusion,both women and men differ in physical and mental abilities. Some people are in favor of the idea that they should be dedicated to professions that are suitable to their capabilities . I am convinced that this is inefficient strategy, and both genders should have their freedom to pick a job they require. It is recommended to give this right for both sexes as the technology advances on daily basis in all arenas.
David.IELTS.Examiner
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Re: assessment required for task2 essay - academic

Post by David.IELTS.Examiner »

Hello!

This is a VERY good essay. There are a few minor errors with grammar and word choice, but everything else is perfect. Organisation is clear. Each main paragraph has a clear topic and sentence order is excellent. Points are clearly developed and appropriate examples are provided. There is a very good range of grammatical structures. There is high level vocabulary and words are chosen with a good degree of precision.

Well done!
David
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Flick
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Re: assessment required for task2 essay - academic

Post by Flick »

hayaalqasem wrote: Sat Apr 22, 2017 3:22 pm Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude male or females from certain professions because of their gender?

It is thought that females and males have distinct abilities. They are different particularly in physical and mental nature. As a consequence, some people claim that it is appropriate to compel men and women to work in specific areas or jobs with respect to their gender. I completely disagree with this claim for two reasons. This essay will explain these two causes and support them with examples.

First, people would appear to be more productive if they choose their career freely. In other words, when females or males opt for their future job according to their personal preference, this will have a positive impact on the productivity of the work. For example, a male teacher who prefers to educate primary school students will feel more satisfied than the one who is forced to apply for specific jobs according to his gender, such as construction worker. As a result, an employee who chose their job freely will achieve a personal fulfillment and offer more efficient service to a society, whereas the other will do their tasks unenthusiastically. For this reason, I feel that individuals should not be obligated to have particular professions.

Second, it is believed that with recent technological advances, both sexes have become capable of performing all forms of occupations. It means that despite discrepancies in the abilities of men and women, electronic equipment and machines have eliminated these differences. For instance, it is possible to find women firefighters and police officers, because the latest-release tools can be used to defend themselves and help them to complete their duties efficiently. Moreover, there are many men who now work as househusbands since the availability of various types of machines including dishwashers, washing machines, and microwaves. These digital appliances facilitate the lives of both men and women, and help them to tackle any type of job, even one which is inconsistent with their potential.

By way of conclusion, both women and men differ in physical and mental abilities. Some people are in favor of the idea that they should be dedicated to professions that are suitable to their capabilities. I am convinced that this is an inefficient strategy, and both genders should have the freedom to pick a job they prefer. It is recommended to give this right to both sexes, as technology advances on a daily basis in all arenas.
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