I would like to ask for observation and evaluation of my writing task 1 :)

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ilitty
Posts: 18
Joined: Mon Dec 12, 2016 11:19 am

I would like to ask for observation and evaluation of my writing task 1 :)

Post by ilitty » Wed Dec 21, 2016 10:47 am

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
» You should write at least 150 words.

Image

The given six pie charts depict the usage of water for different purposes in six different regions of the world. There are represented the three main uses of the water supplies: Industrial use, Agriculture use and Domestic use in six areas: North America, South America, Europe, Africa, Central Asia and South East Asia.
Overall, what stands out from the six pie charts is that most water is used for agriculture purposes in four of the six areas. The exception are North America and Europe, where most of the water is used for industrial use, about 50 per cent of it. South America and Europe are the areas with highest the percentages of water for domestic use. In contrast, in Central Asia, where the used amount for agriculture purposes is well above than in the other regions, there the water used for the other two purposes is the lowest, especially for industrial use.
To sum up, in Africa, Central Asia, South East Asia and South America most of the water is used for agriculture, while in North America and Europe it is used for industrial and domestic purposes.

187 words

David.IELTS.Examiner
IELTS Examiner
IELTS Examiner
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Joined: Tue May 05, 2015 4:34 am

Re: I would like to ask for observation and evaluation of my writing task 1 :)

Post by David.IELTS.Examiner » Sun Dec 25, 2016 2:27 am

Hello!

Not bad, but you need to include more data from the charts in your writing. You could easily do this by putting the figures in brackets (...) after your points/comparisons. You have noted the key points and your grammar and vocabulary are reasonable, despite some errors. Your report is clear.

All the best,
David

ilitty
Posts: 18
Joined: Mon Dec 12, 2016 11:19 am

Re: I would like to ask for observation and evaluation of my writing task 1 :)

Post by ilitty » Mon Jan 09, 2017 9:17 am

Thank you very much!

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