PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS ESSAY

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Rukshana
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Joined: Tue Sep 17, 2013 12:39 pm

PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS ESSAY

Post by Rukshana »

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

The purpose of advertising varies around the world. Throughout history, it has informed consumers of the new products on the market and promotional prices of existing ones. Aside from the introduction of washing machines, microwave, and vacuum cleaner that improves people’s lives. Buying unnecessary goods due to advertisements has been on the rise. This argument will be proven by looking at how people have bought electronic gadgets or fancy luxury cars due to advertisements.
Firstly, technological electronic gadgets are devices designed for a short period of time. For example, IPod has been designed to load song to use while travelling or exercising as it is portable. However, IPod does not have as much functionality as a cell phone. Thus, making it redundant and it is no more popular as a cell phone. This makes it clear that buying things as a result of advertisement is unnecessary. As this shows, buying an IPod has been an absolute waste of money as a cell phone can equally load music.
In addition to this, advertisement of the new Jaguar F-Type has made many people dig deeper into their pocket to acquire one. This impulsive buy has left people in debt. For example, an acquaintance of mine recently bought a new car. He was ecstatic with his new wheels; however, his joy subsided at the end of the month as he is struggling to do the payments. Thus buying a new car due to advertisement is not advisable.
Thus, it is proven that advertisement encourages people to buy unnecessary things.

(256 words)
JoanneGross
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Oct 03, 2013 9:31 am

Re: PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS ESSAY

Post by JoanneGross »

Yes, it is nice to read. I have a doubt that is whether it is the introduction part of your essay, if yes i have a suggestion to you. Try to make the introduction part as an interesting one. Because i have an experience of losing marks for the introduction part of my mass media research topics essay, my teacher told me that it is not an attractive one for the topic. So your introduction must be an interesting one
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Ryan
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Re: PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS ESSAY

Post by Ryan »

Rukshana wrote:Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

The purpose of advertising varies around the world. Throughout history, it has informed consumers of the new products on the market and promotional prices of existing ones. Aside from the introduction of washing machines, microwave, and vacuum cleaner that improves people’s lives. Buying unnecessary goods due to advertisements has been on the rise. This argument will be proven by looking at how people have bought electronic gadgets or fancy luxury cars due to advertisements.
Firstly, technological electronic gadgets are devices designed for a short period of time. For example, IPod has been designed to load song to use while travelling or exercising as it is portable. However, IPod does not have as much functionality as a cell phone. Thus, making it redundant and it is no more popular as a cell phone. This makes it clear that buying things as a result of advertisement is unnecessary. As this shows, buying an IPod has been an absolute waste of money as a cell phone can equally load music.
In addition to this, advertisement of the new Jaguar F-Type has made many people dig deeper into their pocket to acquire one. This impulsive buy has left people in debt. For example, an acquaintance of mine recently bought a new car. He was ecstatic with his new wheels; however, his joy subsided at the end of the month as he is struggling to do the payments. Thus buying a new car due to advertisement is not advisable.
Thus, it is proven that advertisement encourages people to buy unnecessary things.

(256 words)
Hi Rukshana,

I think you need to go back and study basic essay structure again. I am unsure why you share examples in your introduction paragraph. Where is your thesis? Why are several of your sentences incomplete thoughts?

The supporting paragraphs are incoherent in areas. I do not see clear links back to a central idea or argument within the essay. The reader is left guessing what it is you want to say.

Please simplify everything. Shorten your sentences. Avoid using vocabulary you do not fully understand. Start by solidifying your basic skills.

This essay is around band 4.5.
yash567blr
Posts: 16
Joined: Sun Oct 20, 2013 2:52 pm

Re: PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS ESSAY

Post by yash567blr »

As a practice, I wrote the same essay from my point of views. Please let me know ur comments.

>>>>
In today's world, with the advancement of technology products are becoming more user friendly. I do agree with the the point that advertisements helps us in knowing new products in market and there by helping us in making a better choice for our need.

In this busy world, taking time out from our hectic work schedule to visit different shops to know about variety of new products which have come in market is really cumbersome and time consuming. Apart from work, we also need to spend time with family over weekends, hence it is very difficult to look around shops for any new items. Thus advertisements comes to our rescue in these kind of situations.

With the advertisements, we can easily know about the new products and also its price. Sometimes avertisements also dipict how useful they will be and their advantages over other company's products. This will assist in comparing and making the best choice according to our requirement. In some instances, what advertisements claim might not be hundred percent true, so we need to crosscheck about the prodcut and its features over internet or by visiting the shop directly before buying it. This will ensure that we are buying a geniune product.

Though people sometimes get lured with the advertisement and end up with unnecessary products. It is upto the individual to understand the product and its use, before buying it. These advertisements will be very beneficial to us, if we can use it as a information and buy products wisely.

>>>>
bunni015
Posts: 71
Joined: Fri Aug 16, 2013 5:11 pm

Re: PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS ESSAY

Post by bunni015 »

Hi

Advertisement and advertising media always have, had an impact on the audience or common man. It is believed by a sector of people that excessive promotion of any product(s) can affect to being a materialistic. However, some agree the fact that the advertisements helps them to keep updated about various products which can afterwards lead to them to a better life style. There no denial of accepting the advantage about promotions over being materialistic that can help consumers to update about variety of products even if he is not willing to get it.This Inditing argues, that advertisements are a means to know about various goods and their services.

Promoting products using manifold means of advertising media can create a curiosity among the buyers. For instance, A new add-on feature called ‘Smart TV’ is included in an existing Samsung LED TV. This feature enables the consumers to access internet using their slim and sleek TV. Hence this feature needs to be promoted and have to reach appropriate ratio of people. This is, however, promoted using various communication platforms like Promotions in TV, books, hoarding; to name some of the few. Afterwards, the audience show keen interest to know about new features. Hence, publicity is the key part in representing the company developments and encourage people to experience their developments.

On the other hand, advertisements have taken a drastic change in the way they promote a product. For Instance, Kaspersky Antivirus promotes its new product Pure 3.0 as a “free 30-day trial.” This publicity can captivate the computer users and create an interest to know the features about the product . May be latter user might use it for 30 days without paying a single penny. Hence it can be comprehended that if a product want to nail the competitive market these kind of promotions can help them to build their businesses. Thus, it is clear that propagating a product extensively helps to know and experience it.

To compendious, either advertising may lead to become a materialistic or might be useful to be aware of various products available to lead a happy life style. Hence, from the above point of views it is can be comprehended that advertisement is, obviously, a road to know about products and features also, at times it can also experienced. Assuming, in near future manufacturing and consumer manufacturing companies come up with some innovative ways of promoting their products.

Regards,
Bunni
mohit
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Feb 10, 2014 10:36 am

Re: PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS ESSAY

Post by mohit »

In today's world, the use of advertisements have been widely accepted for sale of products. this can be seen for several products relating to people lifestyle. it is agreed that advertisement updates us with new products that may enhance one's life. Analyzing both the reluctance of people from shopping due to increased pace of life as well as the perception of people towards the advertisement of products which are least important will show this.

Firstly, With rapidly changing pace of life people have no time for traditional means of shopping instead, this has been replaced with online promotional activities. For example, online advertisement and purchasing websites like ebay, amazon, etc. these websites promotes products related to every field of life. the only thing the buyer have to perform is look for products they require. infact, such websites also promotes latest products which may interest people. Thus, this makes it clear that online advertisements certainly work towards betterment in people lives.

Secondly, it is true that advertisement promotes products which people do not really need. But, it could be used as a reference or suggestion to a friend or family member who may need it immediately. For instance, one of the Amway product called "nutrilite" for child development, further it also promotes products for elderly people. From this, it becomes quite evident that advertisement surely tells us about new products that could be suggested for improvement of others health.

In conclusion, the increased online shopping of essential products and use of information about new products as recommendation to others. it is clear that why the idea of learning new product information from advertisements has garnered support.


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