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You improve your score when you focus so much that you see yourself solving paper in dreams

QUE - Some people say that it is possible to tell a lot about a person's culture and character from their choice of clothes. Do you agree or disagree? Ans - In today's world( these days), certain members of the society categorize people according to their dressing sense( choices). In addition, they...

The Ry them is causing issues in your speaking. If you speak few words, then pause and collect your thoughts, color your language, you will improve significantly.

I recommend if you break small sentences and take pauses, it will help a lot.

The essay need to follow a proper structure of Ryan. Please check his videos on Youtube.

Please check my comments which I written at this post. Same apply here

viewtopic.php?f=5&t=12351

The English and grammar are quite good. However, you need to be on topic. I would suggest you to check Ryan writing book and practice few essays with him. If you can not access this book, then write the main topic many times and brainstorm and plan your essay. Plan each and every paragraph of your e...

May I points to aligning the essay much better with the topic?

Question: Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of working from home. Answer: These days, working from remote locations become very frequent in modern world. These days trend of working from remote locations is getting attraction. Technologies become more and more reliable and faster, so compani...

Structure is key in essay writing that can be improved only by planning well in advance.

Can you please re write this essay. Both paragraphs should have same length. Both should be summarized in first paragraph.

I am expecting a tremendous improvement if you rewrite this essay again in the same thread. If I write this essay again, it will not give you opportunity to practice your lack areas.

If you write the same essay again and again and I keep pointing your weaknesses, you would practice much better.

Most parts of the essay are out of topic.

Please read the topic many times, write down allowed areas of discussion and then again write the first paragraph.

Although the sentences need to be logically connected.

Q: Some people think that it is better to educate girls and boys in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. A: In many parts of the world ( Does this relate to topic that we are allowed...

Farid, 1. Always plan the essay before you write. Write a high level structure on a paper before you start. This practice would help you to write equal length paragraphs and stay on topic. You will be in position to summarize the third and fourth paragraph in first one. May I suggest to see Ryan wri...

I suggest you check some videos of Ryan and practice some essays. This practice will engrave a structure in your mind.

Secondly, as you write, rewrite the essay topic and your previously written context again and again. This would help you to be on track.

Also plan well before you start writing.

Due to development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people think that closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree? ************************************************...

The essay topic is not addressed

The second paragraph is bit out of topic.
You made an assumption that all listeners are authors?

The essay is out of the topic, particularly the second paragraph.

Please recheck. If you kindly rewrite it again, it will be much improved and I will be in position to assess your skills in more details.

I think you need to follow a structure and plan it well before you start

I would add one point for improvement
The length of second paragraph is shorter

I suggest you can bring tremendous improvements by just following up Ryan structure. Let me know if you need link of relevant videos.

Question: Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single . Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Answe...

1. There are minor issues with the structure. If you check Ryan guidelines on essays structure, you will improve a lot. For example, the conclusions paragraph should have few more lines. 2. You should not use Firstly, Secondly etc. This type of structure is used for the essays where we support one a...

Stay on the topic
Take a bit long pauses between sentences so that you can plan before you speak and avoid grammar mistakes.